SPARK SPARKED
Hello,
I am happily married. I am only beginning to realize that I can’t be faithful to him as I thought I would be. I never told my husband about my past. I told him what I knew could influence his decision to marry me. He thinks I am a good girl. Dave, I can be a good wife and everything else good girls are, but my past is loaded. I have 54 men under my belt. My husband is number 54. Twenty seven out of the number f***ked me well. I keep records when it comes to good sex. My husband is not part of the 27. We married because the first day I met him I knew he was the right one to make family. I forgot to factor in the importance of good sex. My concentration was on his fine looks, and his good character; he wasn’t doing bad for himself in his career. My husband is a likable guy. I was ok tolerating our sex life.
When children came in they took my mind off what it meant to have an orgasm. Dave, I can count the number of times I have experienced orgasm with my husband. I reached that height because I was thinking of some of the 27 characters. You get what I am trying to say right? It was still not a problem till I met one of the 27 that I really, really liked. Our relationship didn’t work because he told me he was going to engage his then wife. He is divorced. We met and the spark sparked. It was natural. No one had to say anything to start anything. It was there between us.
I told him I am married, but Dave, my heart was telling him I missed him. He asked for my number. He called my phone in my presence to say hello. That was that! I saved his digits. It’s been three days and he hasn’t called or said anything. I want to call and say hello too but I am scared of what else could follow after the hello. Of all the men I slept with, I think he’s the one I fell in love with. When we broke off, his last words to me were, I am in love with you. I ended our affair because he told me he was getting engaged. I have never had sleepless nights thinking about my husband like I am thinking of this ex. I’ve been a little distracted in thought because I don’t know what to do with him. I keep staring at his name on my phone and I can’t help but smile.
Do I want to go on a date with him? Yes. Do I want to kiss him? Yes. Do I want to touch his bare chest? Yes. Do I want to give him a BJ? Yes. Do I want him to go deeper and harder? Yes. The feeling is so bad, I want to have his child. I have been asking myself if it’s all lust but it’s deeper than lust. His last words to me before we broke off has come alive to me all over again. I don’t know what to do. I know you will tell me to think about my husband. The problem is, I can’t find my husband in my mind and heart since I met my ex.
Image Credit: Rahul Pandit
