Date Me! (part 3)
This is Nana. I am Bernice’s husband. My wife told me about your request to want to share some of our pictures from her Facebook. I want us to remain anonymous. Sorry. I know my wife wouldn’t mind but I do. But everything happened just as she said.
For her choice of dialogue in her submission, I can only say my wife can be extra in her delivery. When Bernice is telling our story to friends and family, you don’t get to hear just one story. You get to hear two: her version and mine. Her version is always sweeter because she knows how to spice it up with a bit of drama and liveliness.
Remembering peculiar incidents like ours differently doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. My wife’s emotions sometimes color her memory but that’s one of the things I love about her. It makes listening to her fun and entertaining. A few things my wife forgot to add. When I first proposed to her that afternoon at my house, she did not give an affirmative yes. I had to find out how she felt about me asking her dad for her hand in marriage.
Her father and I bonded at their house when she was about to marry Rex. Because I was going to be driving them to the church, I was there waiting and had the opportunity to be introduced to her family. When Rex failed to show up at the Chapel, Bernice’s mother came to join us in the car, but Bernice insisted to be left alone. I left with Bernice because she asked me to drive and go as far away from the situation. I called her father to inform him of where I was taking their daughter.
Her mother and father joined us in my house that evening to check on her. I wasn’t dreading spending time together with my father-in-law because he already approved of me because I was his daughter’s favorite boss at work. He had heard a lot about me from Bernice already. I informed both of her parents about my intentions that same evening and her father was in agreement. I felt they deserved to be informed because they both raised her. My mother-in-law was a bit hesitant initially but she came on board later on, when I assured her of my love for her daughter. I am a confident man and I was honest to her. I was going to take very good care of their daughter.
Just as my wife stated, we did the traditional marriage a month after my proposal. I wasn’t given a list. We were asked to just present the dowry bride wealth so her family members could consent to the marriage. I willingly gave a huge sum of money to be shared and that was it. A day was fixed for me to come and take my bride away. We signed in court the following month and we were officially married. There was no party. There was no merrymaking.
Bernice also forgot to add that, we did not have sex for over three months after we married. What she felt for Rex was real and I didn’t know if she was going to survive without him by her side. Being stood up on her wedding day was one of the hardest things for her to come to terms with. And I understood that. So, I gave her time to process her feelings and grieve her loss. Both of which were of utmost importance as they paved the way for my wife to finally move on to write a new chapter with me.
I love Bernice so much that, I was willing to allow her to be vulnerable and give herself time and space to cry. I was not afraid to join her sometimes to let all of our emotions out and cry together. I drafted a one-year leave request to HR on her behalf, and it was forwarded to me for approval. No one at work knew we had been married for almost a year and a half.
This version plus hers should sum up our full story. Thank you, guys.
Image Credit: Marayah Stumbo
