Let’s Talk To Richmond
David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)
Participant 167: Richmond
DBM: Hello Richmond. How would you describe yourself?
Richmond: Slowing down and allowing myself to feel the feelings in my bones
DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?
Richmond: 6
DBM: What do you want to talk about?
Richmond: My ex supervised one of my building projects to completion. Unfortunately, we broke up and she wants restitution.
DBM: Why did you break up?
Richmond: I met someone else
DBM: After dating your ex for how long?
Richmond: Five to six years. We were engaged
DBM: When did you break up?
Richmond: Two years ago
DBM: You’re still dating the other woman?
Richmond: We are married
DBM: For how long now?
Richmond: 2 years
DBM: How old are you?
Richmond: 42
DBM: How old is your ex?
Richmond: She’s 38
DBM: How old is your wife?
Richmond: 27
DBM: The building project your ex had to oversee, is it a house?
Richmond: Yes. Our plan was to get married and live in it together
DBM: Who lives in that property now?
Richmond: Me and my wife. We have a son
DBM: How old is your son?
Richmond: One and a half
DBM: Why was your ex the one supervising the project?
Richmond: I was not in Ghana. She was the only person I could trust with my money
DBM: Aside the fact that you met someone else, did she do something wrong to you?
Richmond: No
DBM: What kind of compensation is she seeking?
Richmond: Money
DBM: How much?
Richmond: $50, 000 USD
DBM: Do you have 50k?
Richmond: I don’t
DBM: Do you think she’s worth that much money?
Richmond: No
DBM: How much is she worth, in your approximation?
Richmond: Not that much for sure
DBM: Why do you think she’s asking for that amount?
Richmond: I don’t know. She thinks I owe her. I did not marry her. That was my only crime
DBM: Banyin na obotum atoo susu wɔ ne yer ne twɛ’mu na ɔdze akɔma basia fofor dɛ ondzi
Richmond: I cannot read it. Can you translate into English?
DBM: I was only saying it is of the utmost importance we keep our word, as men
Richmond: Yeah!
DBM: What are you going to do about her?
Richmond: She’s threatening to harm my family, and my wife is insisting I report her to the police
DBM: You needed your ex to help you complete your house
Richmond: Yes
DBM: Do you think you mistreated her in the complete picture of what could have been?
Richmond: I moved on. People move on
DBM: That’s very true but did you value her sacrifices for you?
Richmond: I did
DBM: Did you have her best interest at heart, and served her as much as she did you?
Richmond: I did my best
DBM: Describe your best to me
Richmond: Dave, I contacted you because I want to know if it’s harsh to report her to the police
DBM: You left her for another woman because you thought you were smart to realize that you deserved better
Richmond: My wife was the correct decision to make at that time
DBM: Because your ex was not your only option
Richmond: I’m not sure what else to say
DBM: Have you apologized to her?
Richmond: Yes
DBM: And?
Richmond: She’s insisting I compensate her or she harms my family
DBM: Is she capable of carrying out the threat?
Richmond: I don’t know
DBM: If I am threatened in any way or form, I know I will call the police to report the threat.
Richmond: Thank you
DBM: Did you love her?
Richmond: Ex?
DBM: Yes
Richmond: Yes
DBM: Do you love her?
Richmond: I still care
DBM: I think what you did to her makes her feel as though she wasted her love for you. Supervising the building of your house was her way of proving to herself that she was more than capable of loving someone like you. What you did wrong, in return, was to not prove to her that her love and sacrifices for you were not worth it.
Richmond: Life goes on, bro Dave. I’ve moved on.
DBM: Participant 166, Louis, left a question for you: ‘What are you most proud of about yourself?’
Richmond: I am proud of the love I have for myself, and the fact that I am kinda taking care of my emotional and physical needs.
DBM: It’s your turn to leave a question behind for the next participant
Richmond: Do you give to others whatever they ask of you?
DBM: Thank you!
Image Credit: Cloud96 Adedayo
