CROSS-FIRE
David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name you fancy)
Participant 6: Cross will do.
DBM: Tell me anything about yourself
CROSS: I’m just me; easy going, opinionated and massive fun to be with.
DBM: How long have you been married?
CROSS: Nine years.
DBM: What was your perfect ‘type’ of a man or woman? Did your husband or wife fit into your exact specifications?
CROSS: I never had a spec; however, I never wanted a spiritual leader as a spouse. I’m not good with being a role model.
DBM: So, how did you two meet?
CROSS: At his workplace after I completed Senior High School.
DBM: Do you consider your significant other as your best friend?
CROSS: No! My husband is a bit judgmental, and so I am very careful of the things I share with him.
DBM: When did you make him or her laugh the most? What happened?
CROSS: I’m naturally a happy soul. So anytime you are around me, a smile will always be on your face.
DBM: At what point were you certain he or she was the one for you?
CROSS: I was double dating actually; it was him and another guy. Then I got pregnant and was uncertain of who was responsible. I told the other guy and he accepted but I couldn’t handle it, and so I requested for a termination. After the termination of the pregnancy, I bled for two weeks straight and was getting weaker by the day. I avoided my husband, who was then just the other guy throughout the abortion. He came to my workplace uninvited one afternoon. The moment he set his eyes on me, he knew something was wrong and I was dying slowly so I had to open up to him. He acted cool, went out and brought me medications to stop the bleeding, and took care of me through it all. The other guy tried contacting me and my husband (then boyfriend) gave him a piece of his mind. That was when he said a lot of shitty things about me to him, but all my husband told him was that, “she’s now with me, so stay away from her”. That was when I knew that, I had found a diamond in a form of a human.
DBM: Do you still find your husband or wife physically attractive?
CROSS: Very much. My husband is seriously attractive.
DBM: In a deeper conversation with your spouse, do you listen just to completely understand or you listen simply to formulate your response?
CROSS: Yes! We always discuss our daily activities before going to bed. I am an ardent listener as well. Because of him, I read about sports so I can have a meaningful conversation with him.
DBM: How is your significant other faring in the position as a husband or wife?
CROSS: Very well! He is a great husband and a wonderful father.
DBM: Which of your wedding vows means the world to you?
CROSS: Till death do us part.
DBM: What is the most fun you both have had in the relationship?
CROSS: On weekends and holidays when we are home alone without the kids. Having wild sex in the room and gisting about others, etc.
DBM: Is the love for your husband or wife growing any stronger by the day?
CROSS: Mine fluctuates.
DBM: Do you trust your husband or wife?
CROSS: Not really!
DBM: How much time do you spend on your husband or wife?
CROSS: Whenever we have a free time, we spend it together.
DBM: Emotionally, do you feel connected than before?
CROSS: Not really!
DBM: Do you feel secure in the marriage?
CROSS: No! He tried adding up a wife some time ago, and it has changed my perception about the whole marriage.
DBM: Where do you see you and your spouse in the next 10 years?
CROSS: Outside the country with our children.
DBM: What is your ideal sex life?
CROSS: We’re always fuel and fire.
DBM: Rate your current sex life (out of 10)
CROSS: 12/10 😂😂
DBM: What is your understanding of love?
CROSS: Being there for each other and sharing the good, bad and ugly times together. And being available for/to our children.
DBM: Are you feeling loved in your marriage?
CROSS: Of course yes, although I sometimes feel caged.
DBM: Are you a good spouse?
CROSS: I am trying to be better than before.
DBM: Have you cheated on your husband or wife with another man or woman?
CROSS: Emotionally yes, but sexually/physically, no!
DBM: Say something to your spouse from your heart.
CROSS: I do have so much love and admiration for you honey. All I want is for you to get out of your comfort zone and explore more business-wise. I love how you love me and our children; please know we will enjoy this union if only you stay true to me. Yes, I’m not ready to share my husband with anyone!
Image Credits: Anna Shvets
