Let’s Talk To Damian and Lololi

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog.

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 66: I am Damian. My wife’s name is Lololi. We want to participate individually in one segment

DBM: Hello Damian and Lololi. How would you describe yourselves?

Damian: I am tall, dark and handsome. I work for what I have, that’s why my accomplishments taste even sweeter. My wife can attest to this: I confidently hold the floor with exceptional footwork to dance my heart out. I am 59 years, slightly stubborn, but a great dad and husband. My best attribute is randomly having to woo my wife

Lololi: Dam is right about one thing; he’s got crazy dance moves. I am 56 years young, thriving professionally and my own woman. I do not have it all, but I have a bit of everything a woman dreams of. Always been independent; I am a picky eater, I can take silly jokes, and have the basic understanding of time. I can hold a conversation about almost anything with anyone, and I take very good care of my body.

DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?

Damian: I am 8

Lololi: 7 for me

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

Damian: Our 25-year wedding anniversary is this July. I want to talk about my wife and how far we have come

Lololi: I have fallen in and out of love with my husband for the past 25 years. I want to share how I have been able to keep my part of the marriage going when I was out of love

DBM: How did you meet?

Damian: My wife is my ex-girlfriend’s best friend. My cousin had come to Ghana for a short visit, and had asked my then ex, if she knew of any single friends to go on a date with him. It was my third date with her friend. She talked me into agreeing to a double date with my wife and his cousin. That was how we met and decided to make the swap

Lololi: One of my best friends was trying to facilitate a hookup between me and Dam’s favorite cousin. We went on a double date and it was my first time meeting my husband. My friend had told me about Damian, because their relationship was just two weeks old. She had told me she liked him but wasn’t sure he was her type. I remember she once told me; her date was the type I liked. There was a live band playing and Dam asked me to dance with him to my surprise. I agreed to the dance not expecting to like him. My friend was okay with the idea. His cousin, who was supposed to be my date for the evening, danced with my friend, and I actually saw them exchanging numbers. We were on opposite sides, and Dam asked if I was going to have to see his cousin again. His cousin walked to us and told Dam, he felt he had a lot in common with his date. He asked for his permission to date his woman, and he agreed, because he actually felt there was an ongoing chemistry between us.

DBM: Damian, how far had you gone sexually with your ex-date prior to the double date?

Damian: We hadn’t gotten to that stage yet. Our relationship was still fresh

DBM: Where is your cousin and the lady now?

Damian: They’re in Canada, married with children

DBM: At what point did you both know you were meant to be?

Damian: Marriage had always been a huge commitment to undertake. I love to have a lot of fun, and I wasn’t sure I was ready to spend the rest of my life with just one woman. My wife gave me the freedom to express my fears and concerns, without the feeling of judgement. Our friendship was such that, she did not place a demand to make me afraid of losing her. She realized I liked girls a lot, so she gave me the liberty to date other women before settling on one. Unfortunately for me, anytime I was out with another woman, and need to say I went out with a lot, I was always thinking about Lololi. That was when I knew I would rather hang out with her than anyone else. Because I was calling her every evening and sharing every little detail about my day with her.

Lololi: I fell in love with Dam because he is kind and compassionate, very funny and would put me first. I knew he was the man for me because he was taking up a major real space in my mind. I craved for his presence, and did not want happiness for just myself, but for him too. I could confidently trust in my decision to want to be with him, and how he made me feel.

DBM: What were some of your talking points before tying the knot?

Damian: For me, money is everything when it comes to a relationship. Before we married, we had a heart to heart talk on how to prioritize our spending habits. We discussed the sharing of expenses. The second important conversation was about sex. I have entered a relationship in the past because of sex; I have left a relationship because of lack of sex. My overall quality of life looks balanced because I have a lot of good sex.

Lololi: I brought up the topic of children. Luckily for us, we both wanted to have kids. We talked about the possibility of struggling to get pregnant, and agreed on what to do as a team if that happened to us. I am not sexually closed minded, and so we’ve enjoyed a healthy sex life. I told him about my dealbreakers and explained why I wasn’t bothered about him dating different women before deciding to marry me. In marriage, I demand for faithfulness; no secret affairs or relationships. I also requested for a collaboration in exploring different ways to be intimate with me.

DBM: What was the most special part of your wedding celebration?

Damian: When we hit the dancefloor at the reception. All that dancing and laughter was a lot of fun

Lololi: The exchange of vows was my special takeaway. He looked into my eyes with every promise he made

DBM: What has been the most challenging time over the years in your marriage?

Damian: The first nine years were tough on us because we couldn’t have children. I began to question everything and forgot about the agreement I made with my wife. Those were lonely times

Lololi: I found out my husband was having an affair. I rented an apartment close to my workplace, and left him alone in the house for a year. Three months out, I was pregnant with his child. The pregnancy saved my sanity, because I didn’t want to be angry anymore. I had our first son while separated. My son gave me focus, and made me laugh and smile again. Dam swore on the life of our little boy, never to cheat on me again. The promise of fidelity is an important part of my marriage, and true happiness occurs when you are with the right person who respects your value enough to not want to take the risk of hurting or losing you by doing something utterly stupid.

DBM: What are you proudest of as a couple?

Damian: I am proud of my ability to choose monogamy as my lifestyle. It has helped me to form an honest commitment to just my wife. I have found fulfilment in my wife, marriage and family

Lololi: I had to learn how to forgive Dam, at a point where I couldn’t. I prayed to God for a heart like His, so I could do the right thing for my family. Forgiveness has been my proudest moment.

DBM: What does marriage mean to you?

Damian: Giving our relationship the best chance to thrive and succeed.

Lololi: Marriage has inspired me to love myself the most. It’s been my guide to set stronger boundaries to protect my sanity and what serves me. I am not defined by the fact that we are a ‘we’ in this union. I own my voice, actions and opinions, and have been true to myself for the past 25 years.

DBM: You have the last word

Damian: It’s easy to take your spouse for granted if you’re with them all the time. My marriage is better now because I have come to accept that, not everyday will be perfect; not every day will even feel great, and that has to be okay with me.

Lololi: A woman should not give up control over her decisions, just to get married or date a man. Being in love is not the main event of your entire life, so do not see the world through the eyes of the man you love by buying every excuse given you hook, line and sinker. Connect with your inner voice, connect with your passion and dreams, connect with your energy and strength; connect with all of your feelings, especially with anger. Do not leave your sense of self behind so you can make others happy.

Image Credit: Korede Adenola

Let’s Talk To Marc

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog. 5 Comments

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 65: Call me Marc

DBM: Hello Marc. How would you describe yourself?

Marc: A family man; husband to my wife, father to my children.

DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?

Marc: 4

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

Marc: My wife has not returned to the house since Thursday of January 12th this year. Suddenly, I am my kids only parent.

DBM: How many children do you have?

Marc: I have two wonderful kids

DBM: Do you know where your wife is?

Marc: No, but she speaks to me and the kids on phone sometimes

DBM: Do you know when she would be returning home?

Marc: She says she needs some time alone

DBM: How are the kids managing in her absence?

Marc: My son says she was at their school the Thursday afternoon, to inform them about her decision to go away. She bought phones for them and have been calling and sending them money.

DBM: How old are your children?

Marc: 11 and 9

DBM: What are your in-laws telling you?

Marc: Nothing. They do not know where she is

DBM: Does your wife have a job?

Marc: She resigned before the 12th of January

DBM: Did you know?

Marc: I found out from her employers on the 13th of January, when I went to her workplace.

DBM: Do you know why she’s taken off?

Marc: Apparently, she told my children before leaving that she had been trying to convince herself that she was happy being with me when she was not.

DBM: She speaks with you sometimes, no?

Marc: Yes

DBM: What has she told you?

Marc: She’s leaving the marriage

DBM: Is this a conversation you’ve both had, prior to January 12?

Marc: Yes, and I made it clear I wasn’t in agreement. I love my wife, and will be willing to do anything to save our marriage

DBM: In your opinion, is your marriage working?

Marc: My marriage is just like any other relationship; there is nothing perfect about it. I am equally paying the tough price in order to create and maintain a happy home for us.

DBM: Do you think you could be struggling with accepting that, maybe, something isn’t working in your marriage – and that could be the reason why your wife had to walk away?

Marc: Massa, no relationship is easy. Even the best of marriages have issues in there that they deal with daily. We have our issues to work out, and I have been here, willing to talk it out. I have made a lot of sacrifices and changes – just to accommodate my wife

DBM: Why is your wife unhappy?

Marc: That’s the question she’s refusing to answer. She once told me she feels alone and trapped, and that, it wasn’t about me.

DBM: Do you think she found herself in a relationship that was a wrong fit?

Marc: Dave, marriage is like having a second good job. Most great jobs may pay well but that doesn’t mean they’re comfortable and easy. Whenever I get home, I know I am entering into my second, full-time job. I take off work and put on family. I roll up my sleeves and start working on what needs to be done

DBM: Like?

Marc: Giving my wife a hug or kiss, asking about her day, checking on the children and asking about their day; eating if there is food etc. My wife is my best friend, and truly one of the best human beings alive

DBM: Are you her best friend?

Marc: I’d want to believe so. She treats me right, even though I realized she was drifting apart as at last year.

DBM: What do you think your wife feels is missing in your marriage?

Marc: I don’t think I know

DBM: Do you know what she is searching for that she couldn’t possibly find in you?

Marc: Maybe, a new man. That could be my only answer. I am a good man Dave

DBM: I don’t doubt that. Question is, why couldn’t your good self be enough for her?

Marc: Can I ask you a question?

DBM: Ask away

Marc: Do you believe in marriage?

DBM: I do

Marc: How would you know your person is enough for you?

DBM: When I am not putting more of my effort into making the relationship work than I am enjoying being with my partner (who would/should qualify as the love of my life)

Marc: David, how do you know someone is the love of your life?

DBM: I just would know.

Marc: How?

DBM: I am supposed to be asking you the questions

Marc: Bruv, we’re having a chat to help me understand things from a different perspective

DBM: When I do not have to wonder where my relationship with you is heading; when I do not have to question whether or not you care about me, because I would already know how much you love me. This is due to the fact that you step up every day in your actions to make it clear to me that, you want me in your life, just as I am

Marc: Hmmm!

DBM: What is your intuition telling you?

Marc: My wife is not in love with me, and I am the one forcing her to stay with me

DBM: Do you see your wife happy with you?

Marc: I can make her happy

DBM: I believe you can, but is she in awe of you as her man?

Marc: I don’t think so

DBM: Do you believe she knows you’re a good man?

Marc: She does

DBM: Good is just not good enough for some people. I see marriage to be for one’s pleasure

Marc: My wife is my greatest pleasure

DBM: Are you her greatest pleasure? These are some of the questions you need to ask. She may be making you happy but you clearly aren’t her definition of happiness

Marc: We’ve done almost 13 years of marriage

DBM: Letting go can sometimes feel impossible, especially when you do not have much about someone or something to complain about. But it’s the right thing to do to let go, if your wife feels lonely and caged with you in her life.

Image Credit: Tima Miroshnichenko

Let’s Talk To Mr

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog. 3 Comments

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 64: Call me Mr.

DBM: Hi Mr. How would you describe yourself?

Mr: A concerned father

DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?

Mr: 6

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

Mr: I have a 13-year-old son who acts very girly. When he was younger, my wife caught him a few times dressing like a girl. He would wear his sister’s shoes, paint his nails, wear his mother wigs etc. When he is arguing with his siblings, he claps his hands like an angry woman and can be very dramatic. He rolls his eyes like a girl, pout his lips like a girl, walk like a model, play with his sister’s barbie dolls, the list goes on. My mother visited us one day and saw him cross-dressing. She told my wife to keep an eye on him. My son reminds me so much of my cousin

DBM: What’s wrong with your cousin?

Mr: I don’t want to talk about him

DBM: Does your son still act that way in his teens?

Mr: Not so much to my knowledge. But he still acts girly, paints his lips and nails sometimes. He likes wearing tight clothes to show his curves. I think he’s having a hard time in school. He hasn’t said anything to this effect, but I feel like people make fun of him

DBM: What’s his favorite hobby?

Mr: Applying make-up on his sister, female friends, dolls and dressing them up. Someone told me it’s a phase he is going through

DBM: Do you wish for it to be a phase?

Mr: Yes. It’s very embarrassing when we’re in public. Everybody notices the elephant in our midst.

DBM: What does your wife think of him?

Mr: We’re both afraid of the probability of him ending up like my cousin who is rumored to be a homosexual.

DBM: How many kids do you have?

Mr: A boy and a girl, two.

DBM: Have you asked him why he is always behaving like a girl?

Mr: Yes. He says he doesn’t know how to act boyish like his male friends. The least thing, and he’s crying. He thinks everybody is against him.

DBM: Does it look like everybody is against him?

Mr: We do that on purpose sometimes at home. We have tried to expose him to boyish ideas but he doesn’t seem to change.

DBM: Explain the ‘trying to expose him to boyish ideas …’

Mr: We forced him to act like a boy

DBM: And, was he interested in your ideas?

Mr: No. He felt attacked and would cry

DBM: He was uncomfortable

Mr: We’re also uncomfortable with his way of life. What else can a parent do in such a situation?

DBM: Stop forcing him into the boy role

Mr: We are a Christian household living by this scripture, ‘train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.’ (Prov. 22:6.) I want him to be the boy who will grow into a man, to love a woman

DBM: Did your parents have a hand in your decision to love your wife?

Mr: No

DBM: Why do you want to involve yourself in your son’s future love life?

Mr: He needs to know what is right and wrong

DBM: What is right?

Mr: A boy has to act like a boy

DBM: How do boys act?

Mr: They act straight, and like girls

DBM: You want my candid opinion?

Mr: Yes

DBM: Teach your son how to be a great human being, and just be patient with him.

Mr: I want to teach him how to be a great BOY

DBM: And, what if your boy is created to be more in touch with his feminine side?

Mr: What if I don’t want that?

DBM: What if that is what makes him his own person, and would need his father and mother help him to be comfortable with who he is?

Mr: Who he is gravitating towards to is in Genesis 19:1-38

DBM: What is in Genesis 19?

Mr: Sodom and Gomorrah

DBM: Those are names of cities

Mr: Dave, you know the story I am talking about.

DBM: You, just like the others in church practice selective outrage. You pick scriptures from the Bible that you can run to – to justify your positions against same gender attraction and love. Sodom and Gomorrah is not a story about homosexuality. It’s a lesson on violence, rape (a mob of men wanting to assault innocent Angels/men). Your son growing up to fall in love with another guy (should that be his path) has nothing whatsoever to do with a crowd of guys trying to rape somebody in Genesis 19.

Mr: You’re misinterpreting the verse

DBM: I am just telling you my understanding of the scripture you quoted. In Genesis 19:6-8, Lot goes out to meet the angry mob at his entrance and begs them to rather rape his two virgin daughters. It’s a shame that some of you so-called Christians would rather identify homosexuality in that scripture, but not address the sexual violence against women and men.

Mr: God destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah. That is what I don’t want to happen to my son

DBM: Those cities were destroyed by GOD because of their pride, idolatry, wickedness, corruption, lack of empathy and care for the poor and needy. Read Ezekiel 16:49-50

Mr: Let’s end this argument; it’s not heading anywhere for me

DBM: I do not know the Will of GOD for your son, but please do not stress yourself too much about him being gay. At 13 years, he is still too young to determine his sexual orientation.

Mr: What if he ends up becoming what I fear the most?

DBM: Then you face your fears like a man. Fear usually sprawls from not knowing very much about that very thing we fear. Get close to your son to know him more; talk to/with your son to understand how he thinks and feels; make him feel like you accept and love him for whomever he is. GOD blessed you with this child as an opportunity to teach him about unconditional love and acceptance.

Image Credits: Monstera

Let’s Talk To Amakai

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog. 3 Comments

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 63: I’m Amakai

DBM: Hello Amakai. How would you describe yourself?

Amakai: A mother, wife, hard worker, kind, and very easygoing

DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?

Amakai: I’ll say 5

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

Amakai: My husband cums about four times inside me before pulling out during sex. He thinks I don’t know when he ejaculates, because he tries so hard not to make any noise to give up his emotions. He continues after a few seconds of rest, whiles in me till he’s cum the second, third or forth time, before pulling out. I read a message he sent to one of his secret side chicks that he can last over 15 minutes in bed. 15 minutes of precums isn’t a lasting to boast about.

DBM: Well, pulling out around such pleasurable, intense feelings isn’t feasible.

Amakai: It’s not fun either for me

DBM: What has your husband’s confidence, self-worth, connection and validation got to do with your assessment of him?

Amakai: He’s not good in bed

DBM: Have you told him that?

Amakai: No, because it’s not worth it. He’s always thinking with his dick.

DBM: Most guys do

Amakai: Can’t a man cum just once, take in the moment, rest for a while, before thinking of the next round?

DBM: Would you willingly give in to a second round after he’s taken that long break – you’re proposing?

Amakai: I might. But even if I don’t, I’m still his wife and he can always get another intimate moment with me the next day.

DBM: How many times do you two have sex in a week?

Amakai: At most, twice or thrice. It depends on our schedule for the week. We have children and our respective professional careers to attend to.

DBM: Most guys want sex all the time. Do you know that?

Amakai: Most women do not want sex all the time. Do you know that? Because I am in this category

DBM: Does your husband know you do not like too much of sex?

Amakai: Yes. It was one of the first conversations we had while dating.

DBM: And he said he was okay with that?

Amakai: He didn’t have a problem with it

DBM: Did you understand his need for sex when you guys were dating?

Amakai: Yes, and he wasn’t this aggressive to take it all at a go. Now, it’s like he has to have all the sex with me when the opportunity presents itself, because he feels he doesn’t know when I would give in to his demands. That’s the unspoken signal sent me

DBM: If you’re having sex twice in a week, and your husband is the type that loves to have a lot of sex, what do you think is going on in his mind?

Amakai: How would I know? Should everything in marriage be about sex? How about his wife who isn’t so rooted when it comes to sex? How about the wife who is the mother of our children, and is present to them 90% of the time while he is out? How about the wife who also works the 9 to 5 job every week?

DBM: I can only speak from my point of view as a guy. I know a lot of guys connect to their spouses emotionally through sex. Them not having enough sex could force such guys, consciously or unconsciously to have little or no real emotional connection towards you.

Amakai: Dave, I do my best for him in that department.

DBM: How often does he communicate with you on issues?

Amakai: We talk when we have to talk

DBM: When last did he ask about your day?

Amakai: Dave

DBM: Yes?

Amakai: Why all these questions?

DBM: I am trying to have a conversation with you about your husband. Tell me about his mood swings

Amakai: He is simply not a happy guy. There is nothing I can do to change that

DBM: How much time does he spend at home with you and the children?

Amakai: Not much

DBM: What is his typical weekend like?

Amakai: Gym, friends, work, work… work

DBM: Do you get the feeling that your husband desires to be with you?

Amakai: He tries to be there for us

DBM: Whereby ‘us’ means?

Amakai: Home, the children, me, etc.

DBM: I am talking about you; him wanting to be there, specifically for you

Amakai: No

DBM: Then he is not feeling as connected with you

Amakai: That’s not my doing, Dave. He is choosing not to be with his wife who loves him

DBM: A man can love and be in love with you and not be connected to you.

Amakai: Because of sex?

DBM: Just as you would want him to be emotionally supportive and forthcoming, so does he want you to be emotionally connected with/to him, through sex.

Amakai: So, for you guys, everything is about the physical?

DBM: It’s not entirely about physicality; a lot of things are tired to sex for men.

Amakai: Women get tired

DBM: I know

Amakai: Are you sure you guys know that? Because if it were left to my husband alone, he’d prefer I stop all that I would be doing just to attend to his sexual needs

DBM: How about choosing to also interpret such calls to mean, your husband’s desperation to want to be close to his beloved wife?

Amakai: So, because I am his wife, I am obligated to have sex with him in order to keep him around?

DBM: That’s not what I am saying. There are men out there who can have zero sex with their women, and still choose to be excited about, be faithful to, and be emotionally attracted to them.

Amakai: That is not the man I am married to

DBM: You know him best. But please do not pull away your trust for his masculine energy and direction. Wake up your feminine energy

Image Credit: Jeferson Gomes

Let’s Talk To Light Soup

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog.

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 62: Light Soup

DBM: Hi Light Soup. How would you describe yourself?

LS: 41 years, married, a father, gainfully employed, and I think I am a good friend to my friends. I am the type to support my inner circle if they’re feeling down. I love football and hanging out with my peers.

DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?

LS: 7

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

LS: I loaned one of my friends’ money. The agreement was he had to pay back after four months. Because of the amount involved, I suggested he rather made monthly payments of a certain percentage. He felt it would be too much pressure on him, and so he opted to make a one-time payment instead on the due date.

DBM: How much are we talking about?

LS: 8,000 Ghs.

DBM: When did you give him the money?

LS: August 2022

DBM: Has he paid?

LS: No! Not even 1 Ghs.

DBM: What is his excuse?

LS: The excuses are different every time, but sickness has been the most used

DBM: Why did you give him the money?

LS: He played the sickness card on me; said the daughter needed surgery, and I couldn’t just sit back and do nothing.

DBM: Was the daughter truly ill?

LS: I met the wife one day, and I asked about their daughter’s surgery and she said I might be confusing her with another’s incident. She was clueless, and so I blamed it on a mix-up.

DBM: When was this?

LS: October 2022

DBM: Did you confront your buddy?

LS: I did not. I just wanted my money back in December, 2022.

DBM: Did you make him sign a promissory note to effect payment?

LS: No. We had the extended conversation on WhatsApp, after his phone call. I have proof via our chat

DBM: Was this his first time of asking you for help?

LS: Yes, but he had been taking smaller amounts from our circle of friends.

DBM: The surgery lie aside, does your friend genuinely seem to be in need of help?

LS: I think so

DBM: Does he work?

LS: He’s employed

DBM: What’s his profession?

LS: He’s in academia, a lecturer at the university

DBM: How urgent do you need the money?

LS: I had budgeted to use it for the Christmas holidays. Because I was sure he was going to pay back, I planned with it and didn’t put aside anything. I am very disappointed in him right now. I stopped calling him in February, because I am really hurt.

DBM: It’s never a good idea to lend family and friends money. If you’re gifting the person cash, that’s a totally different story.

LS: The sad part is, I had been blessing him and his family with money prior to the loan.

DBM: I know how you’re feeling. I have been a victim of being played by some friends I loaned out monies to. For some reason, I think they see me to be ‘okay’ in life, and so they’re refusing to pay back – forgetting I had to deny myself some things in order to give them the money

LS: What do you think I should do?

DBM: Are you in a financial bind? As in, do you really, really need the money paid?

LS: Not really, but I still feel it’s disrespectful on his part

DBM: It is, unfortunately. And he will realize it sooner than later, because there is coming a time in his life to desperately need your help again. I am speaking from experience.

LS: How did you handle yours?

DBM: I forced myself to create a mental ledger, in order to consider the almost GHs 11,000 in-total loan given them as their buying out of their friendship with me fee. I respond to them nicely when they check on, or meet me somewhere. I tolerate them for the short time they’re in touch, and that’s that.

LS: I don’t know if I can do that. We used to be really cool buddies

DBM: You’d have to learn how to if you do not want to find yourself getting angry or upset if he’s to decline repayment.

LS: What if he pays back eventually?

DBM: Count it as a bonus, and his friendship still bought out.

LS: I don’t understand why some people find it ok not to be trustworthy

DBM: Some people genuinely are struggling to keep ahead of their bills and life in general. Life happens to people who are ordinarily trustworthy, to sometimes become liars. Many of such people are feeling very low and anxious; especially when they lose their jobs, and are made redundant somewhat. A lot of people are struggling with debt. Let’s not rule out that fact.

LS: Truth

DBM: I have needed people’s help and support to survive in a time in my life; reason why I was encouraged to pay it forward when I got back on my feet.

LS: Are you still loaning people money?

DBM: No. I’m at a point in my life that I need to be conscious of putting on my own oxygen mask on before reaching out a helping hand. If I am in the position to support someone at a point, of course, I do.

LS: Should I call him one last time to demand for my money before considering our friendship bought out? But charley, 8k no bi small cash o

DBM: It’s a lot off money, I agree with you. Call him if that’s going to sit well with your conscience

LS: Thank you David. You’re nice

DBM: You’re welcome. There are other good people out there for us to experience as friends. You seem like a good man. Allow others in need of a true friend to share in your wonderful friendship.

Image Credit: Tima Miroshnichenko

Let’s Talk To Diahann

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog. 2 Comments

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 61: My name is Diahann

DBM: Hello Diahann. How would you describe yourself?

Diahann: I would describe myself as compassionate, and I know I will not hurt anyone intentionally. I am relatable, well-rounded, and know how to have a lot of fun – probably because I’ve been around the block quite a number of times. My boyfriend says, I bring so much fulfillment and satisfaction in our relationship.

DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?

Diahann: Oh, a cool 9

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

Diahann: I am secretly dating one of my girlfriends’ ex-husband. It’s a secret relationship because I don’t know how she’s going to take the news if I am to break it to her. I am worried about her reaction if she’s to find out on her own. I am trying to prevent her getting hurt or feeling betrayed.

DBM: How long have you been dating him?

Diahann: Almost three years.

DBM: How long was he married to your friend?

Diahann: Seven years and some coins.

DBM: When was their divorce finalized?

Diahann: November of 2018

DBM: Was he your friend when he was with your friend?

Diahann: Yes, but not as close as I was with his ex-wife

DBM: Your friend, you mean?

Diahann: Yes!

DBM: What did you know about their marriage?

Diahann: I knew she wasn’t happy with him. There were times she could call me and cry and complain about his affairs with other women.

DBM: And, what were you telling her?

Diahann: First and foremost, it was difficult for me to just sit my behind somewhere, discussing her marriage in the absence of her ex. They are both my friends, and I wasn’t sure I was the best person for her to come to. The second thing is, my friend was suffering in silence in her marriage; it wasn’t working as she had hoped it would. I suggested she dealt with the situation or simply move on. Life is short, Dave. No one deserves to be frustrated by a spouse – all in the name of marriage.

DBM: Has your boyfriend told you his side of the reason for the divorce?

Diahann: All he said was, she wouldn’t stop getting on his last nerve

DBM: Did you by any chance get in the way of their marriage?

Diahann: Get in the way how?

DBM: Interfere with your opinions as her sounding-board of a sort

Diahann: No. It wasn’t my place to

DBM: Did you or your boyfriend ever seek any form of emotional connection with one another, while he was married to your friend?

Diahann: Never. In fact, I hated him for always causing my friend pain and unhappiness

DBM: If you suspect that one of your close friends is hanging around your ex-boyfriend, would you want her to let her intentions known to you?

Diahann: I don’t think so. That would be entirely her business. He is my ex for a reason

DBM: How did your relationship with him begin?

Diahann: I was supposed to be on a date with a guy who stood me up. My boyfriend just happened to be eating at the same restaurant. He saw me, and joined me at my table to build conversation since I was alone. When he realized my date wasn’t showing, he kept me company. He ordered food for me and the conversations continued. We hadn’t talked nor seen each other since their divorce

DBM: Did you tell your friend about your date, and how her ex-husband just happened to be there to keep you company?

Diahann: She knew I was stood up; we had been texting the whole of that afternoon to prepare me for my date. I didn’t mention the ex-husband part though

DBM: Why not?

Diahann: I didn’t think it was important

DBM: At what point did you realize you liked him?

Diahann: Right at the table on my date fiasco. He says, he realized how awesome I was, right at the beginning of our ‘first’ unplanned date lunch. He kissed me unexpectedly after eating, and I kissed back. He fell in love with me, and I would add, has been loyal to me. He respects me and our relationship, and understands my worth

DBM: I see. He fell in love with you, right there and then?

Diahann: Yes, that’s what he told me.

DBM: It does happen, I don’t doubt you.

Diahann: He did not contact me for about a week after the ‘date’. I didn’t sulk or feel hurt. He called on the eighth day to ask for a proper date night. That evening, I knew I was falling madly in love with him because the kiss had been on my mind for days.

DBM: We’re talking about the same guy you hated because he was making the life of your friend, a living hell?

Diahann: Same one. I’ve come to understand that, he’s not the type of man to hurt a woman for the fun of it. I had been pretending with my feelings for months till he told me how much he loves me

DBM: How much is his love for you?

Diahann: Worth more than 100 Cedis

DBM: Are you in love with him?

Diahann: I am all over him in love. I had to change my perceptions about him to accommodate his love for me.

DBM: Why do you think you fell for him that quickly?

Diahann: Because I know him. Also, he has something to add to every conversation we have. To be honest, until my friend started criticizing him about their marriage, I aways assumed he was a cool catch. I haven’t been so easy to get, nor so eager to please. He’s just been the perfect gentleman with my experience with him. Also, I made it hard for him to read me like a book on our ‘first’ date. I had blocked myself emotionally to him to get through to. He’s the real deal

DBM: For how long is he going to remain your best kept secret?

Diahann: That’s what I am trying to figure out.

DBM: In your opinion, was your friend right about her ex-husband?

Diahann: Since becoming a couple, he’s accounted for all his flaws, and is working through them to become a better man for me. Right now, our relationship is our most important friendship. And so far, it’s been working out just fine.

DBM: I am happy for you.

Image Credit: Gustavo Fring

Let’s Talk To Titanium

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog. 1 Comment

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 60: Titanium is my nickname

DBM: Hi Titanium. How would you describe yourself?

Titanium: I am the captain of my ship, cruising all around with a few guests on board. Some of the guests are making crazy demands, and I am giving in to a few of their requests. This is causing my ship to drift from right to left on the sea.

DBM: Is that not scary?

Titanium: It is, but I am loving it at the same time.

DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?

Titanium: 6

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

Titanium: I fall in love faster than I cum. Dave, I am so visual and it’s scaring the shid outta me. I am married but I fall in love with any nice girl that makes me feel special. A fine gal tells me ‘I love you’, and my natural response to her is, ‘I love you too’.

DBM: Lol!

Titanium: I’m serious bro

DBM: Why did you marry your wife?

Titanium: She fell in the same category: easy to talk to, trustworthy and attractive. She asked me to marry her

DBM: I see. Were you in love with her?

Titanium: I was. I was in love with the others before and after her too

DBM: How do you know you’re in love with a woman?

Titanium: When she tells me she loves me, and I give my automatic response.

DBM: What type of woman are you attracted to?

Titanium: The types I am not able to stop thinking about. They come in all shapes and sizes

DBM: Most of the times, the key to getting what you want is knowing exactly what you want

Titanium: I know what I want. I love women.

DBM: Do these women you end up with, make you happy?

Titanium: They do

DBM: Do they know you’re not exclusive with them?

Titanium: Yes. I tell them I am married and cannot be in another relationship with them. Some choose to move on while others hang around till they meet someone else. But anytime I am on a date, I prepare myself for what might or not happen at the end of the date.

DBM: What usually happens after the first date?

Titanium: We have sex, and then end up becoming emotionally attached to each other – even though we may not be ready for that

DBM: And, are these women you go on dates and sleep with, right for you?

Titanium: We usually have great chemistry, and I am drawn to them

DBM: Drawn to them in which sense?

Titanium: They make me a part of their plans

DBM: Does chemistry become love for you?

Titanium: Sometimes, yes!

DBM: Is your marriage balanced?

Titanium: My wife is perfect; nothing wrong with her. Nothing wrong with our marriage. I don’t know if it’s because she’s given me too much space and freedom?

DBM: But you mentioned earlier you were like this, prior to meeting your wife, no?

Titanium: Yes

DBM: Okay!

Titanium: I am the problem

DBM: How do you feel after coming to the realization that – your wife married a whole project and that, she should be hitting her head to a brick wall because you will never change?

Titanium: I sometimes feel horrible

DBM: You know that, in-as-much-as you cannot control your thoughts and feelings, you have every control over your actions?

Titanium: I know, but the girls of today are very attractive. It’s difficult not to lose focus

DBM: There is always someone attractive everywhere we go. However, genuine intimacy with the right person isn’t found everywhere

Titanium: True

DBM: What are your priorities in life right now?

Titanium: I want to make a shitload of money from my business, so I can take care of my children, wife and women. It will make me very happy, and also, calm me down.

DBM: If I am getting the order right, money is your first priority?

Titanium: I need to earn to take care of myself and family

DBM: Your children come second?

Titanium: Yeah!

DBM: How many kids do you have?

Titanium: My wife may chance upon this conversation if you publish it. I don’t want to reveal so much about my personal life.

DBM: Alright!

Titanium: Dave, I make time for my wife. I give her my full presence whenever we are together. I am a good husband and father.

DBM: Okay!

Titanium: I care about her

DBM: Imagine your wife being the exact carbon-copy of your character; would you have allowed yourself to be caught up in the web of believing that you could fix her to be committed solely to you – forgoing all others?

Titanium: She doesn’t know about this side of me. She’s not affected in any way

DBM: But she’s going to figure you out someday soon

Titanium: Till then…

DBM: Is your wife the most compatible for you?

Titanium: No, but I am willing to wipe the puke off her face, sit by her bedside at the hospital for as long as possible, support her in the good and bad times. I’ve got her back

DBM: Good for you.

Image Credit: Cottonbro Studio

Let’s Talk To Milk & Honey

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog.

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 59: Milk & Honey

DBM: Hello Milk ‘n’ Honey. How would you describe yourself?

M&H: I am not the type that falls into the ruse that buying or having the next nice thing will give me the gratification I may be looking for in life. I am okay if people do not choose me to hang out with. I am okay if others have fun without me. I do not attribute my worth to my social presence. I eat healthy and nutritious meals, I drink a lot of water, my mental health is of utmost concern to me; I make sure I am feeling good inside and out, I hardly would take anything too personally or to heart to hurt my feelings. My daily routine is to strive to be better than I was the day before.

DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?

M&H: 8.5 over 10, I think.

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

M&H: I’ve had my fair share of being in ridiculous relationships, whereby I was prioritizing love over respect, trust and affection. My third relationship, actually was my wake-up-call to the fact that, being in love with a man should not be the reason for me to stay in a relationship with him. I tolerated certain behaviors in my past relationships that I shouldn’t have, and finally made the difficult decision not to force my heart to people who didn’t deserve my love. I decided to be a single mother if I weren’t dating or married to a solid guy by the age of 36.

DBM: How old are you today?

M&H: 36

DBM: I see

M&H: And I am eight months pregnant.

DBM: Oh, wow! You, did it?

M&H: I did.

DBM: Congratulations!

M&H: Thank you!

DBM: You’re in a relationship, I guess?

M&H: No!

DBM: Okay?

M&H: Five days before ovulation last year, I had sex with someone. I had already made plans with myself to have a baby, and so I decided to find the ‘perfect’ candidate to sleep with during my fertile window.

DBM: ‘Perfect candidate’ meaning?

M&H: He had to be intelligent, kind, courageous and creative.

DBM: Is this a random guy or you already knew him?

M&H: I know him. He’s a friend and colleague from work.

DBM: Is he single?

M&H: No, he’s married.

DBM: I see

M&H: There was and is nothing going on between us.

DBM: So, why did he agree to this?

M&H: He doesn’t know he is responsible for my pregnancy

DBM: But he knows he had unprotected sex with you, no?

M&H: I don’t know. But he knows we had sex that one time

DBM: Really?

M&H: We were slightly tipsy, I think

DBM: Were you drunk?

M&H: Not really, but he was.

DBM: You did not plan this with him, you also mentioned nothing ever going on between you two; how did you manage to get him to sleep with you?

M&H: As I said, he is my friend. I knew his hangouts with friends that weekend. I just happened to be there that evening while they partied.

DBM: Where did the sex happen?

M&H: In my car.

DBM: What was his reaction after the sex?

M&H: We’ve not talked about it.

DBM: He sees you pregnant though, no?

M&H: Yes. He’s congratulated me and is happy for me and the baby-daddy.

DBM: Which baby-daddy?

M&H: Everyone at work thinks I have a secret boyfriend.

DBM: Smh! Including him?

M&H: Especially him. I had to sell that storyline.

DBM: He’s buying it?

M&H: Not sure, because he’s started befriending my girlfriends and asking questions about my imaginary boyfriend.

DBM: Your girlfriends know about your plan?

M&H: Nobody knows.

DBM: So, you truly got pregnant after the action in your car with him?

M&H: Yes!

DBM: That was quick

M&H: I wasn’t sure I was ready to be a mother, even though I had planned the process to the last detail.

DBM: How did you feel when you found out you were expecting?

M&H: I was in shock. I sobbed for hours because I couldn’t believe it could happen to me. I am going to love this baby with all of my heart.

DBM: Are you going to involve the father at any point in time?

M&H: No! I am raising her all by myself.

DBM: It’s a girl?

M&H: Yes! I am having a princess, and she’s going to be the greatest blessing of my life.

DBM: Why don’t you want to involve the guy?

M&H: Dave, I have a mind of my own. I am financially stable and can take care of my needs and that of the baby’s. I am up for the challenge as a single mother, and do not need to depend on him. I take responsibility for my own actions and happiness. Most importantly; I do not think I need a man to feel complete.

DBM: Okay!

M&H: Also, I know he has a girlfriend. A man cheating on his wife is an evidence to me that, he will resort to the same behavior after giving him my attention. I am not settling for a flawed connection.

DBM: Understood. Why did you want to chat with me?

M&H: My pregnancy scenario may not be the best example, but I knew what my dream was. I knew what my life needed the most at this point in time. It was a plan I could achieve, though babies are a gift. I want to encourage anyone with a plan in mind or a dream, to follow through with the steps in pursuing their passions. You can turn your reality into something you believe can make you happy. We are never going to make everyone in our lives happy, no matter what we do or say. That is why we have to realize that, we are the only ones in our lives to understand our decisions and choices; our deepest fears and wishes. Only you know what’s in your best interest.

DBM: I concur.

Image Credits: A&C Photos

Let’s Talk To Stacy

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog.

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 58: My name is Stacy

DBM: Hi Stacy. How would you describe yourself?

Stacy: There is not much to say

DBM: How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?

Stacy: 3

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

Stacy: My cousin is pregnant for my husband. He told me about their relationship not long ago.

DBM: Why did he tell you?

Stacy: Because he realized I had been my happiest since finding out about her pregnancy.

DBM: Has she confirmed what your husband has made known to you?

Stacy: Yes!

DBM: What did she say?

Stacy: She said she was sorry

DBM: That was that?

Stacy: I couldn’t ask any more questions

DBM: Why?

Stacy: Dave, I still don’t know why

DBM: You cannot fix what you will not confront

Stacy: I know!

DBM: What’s going through your mind right now?

Stacy: I don’t even know how I feel about them right now. My cousin has been my biggest encouragement throughout the years. She’s given me the best laughs and smiles anytime we were together. I don’t understand why they could do this to me.

DBM: How are you taking it all in at home with your husband?

Stacy: It’s not easy. I am heartbroken at this point. I am trying to stay strong for our marriage but it’s not getting me anywhere.

DBM: I don’t think it’s your place to be ‘strong’ for a spouse or significant other who has chosen to cheat on you.

Stacy: A lot of people look up to us and our marriage. My fear is disappointing them if I am to opt for a divorce.

DBM: How long are you willing to save face?

Stacy: Hmmm! But is it okay to walk away from an 11-year-old marriage?

DBM: What do you want to do?

Stacy: I don’t know for now.

DBM: You love him?

Stacy: I love my husband dearly, but I do not like what he’s done to our marriage. It’s a dealbreaker for me. I am concerned about our children and what others would say if I walk away.

DBM: Do you want to walk away?

Stacy: Yes!

DBM: Why?

Stacy: Because he broke our covenant, and I cannot trust him anymore. Dave, a lot of men have expressed interest in me, even with the knowledge of my marital status. The love and respect I have for my husband has been the enabling knock pushing other admirers away. Why couldn’t my husband show me the same measure of respect? I have chosen transparency in our marriage because I want to be honest with him through and through.

DBM: He’s been honest with you now, no?

Stacy: I don’t think I am willing to allow him to dust me with his dirt. I feel betrayed.

DBM: You can love someone enough to let them go

Stacy: I know, but who would want a mother of two kids?

DBM: Stacy, ‘a mother of two kids’ is also a whole package. You’re a good-looking woman, and there is someone to love on you wholeheartedly – without making you feel that because you’re a mother of two, something is inadequate about you.

Stacy: True!

DBM: Again, your husband did mess up but try not to judge him based on his worst day

Stacy: It’s actually not fair to say that to me. He had a choice to be disciplined

DBM: When it comes to love and its commitments, discipline is a MUST, and not a choice.

Stacy: Exactly, Dave. I equally get tempted to look elsewhere when situations in our marriage makes him less than the stellar man to hold up high. This is not the first time that I have been tempted to cut things off between us. This is not the first time I have been tempted to cheat on my husband because my gut was telling me he was entertaining another woman. I have been hanging in there, hoping our commitments to one another would get better.

DBM: So, he’s been unfaithful in the marriage before?

Stacy: Yes! He made me question my over-reactiveness and sensitivity. He made me believe I was misinterpreting everything. Cheating has never been worth it for me. I believe as a couple, we all do well when we decide to do better.

DBM: I concur!

Stacy: The grass has also looked greener on the other side for me, but…

DBM: I get you.

Stacy: And the reason why I am not willing to fight for this marriage any longer is that, my husband told my cousin I am a ‘decent’ woman – and will go to unusual lengths just to keep him and the marriage happy.

DBM: Are you his definition of decency?

Stacy: I was

DBM: Do you feel obliged to choose your husband and marriage because of the children or what others would think?

Stacy: I used to, but I am beginning to realize I have to care more about what I deserve

DBM: I know you may have expected more from your husband. And I can understand how disheartening his actions have been

Stacy: How do I get over the fear of letting people down?

DBM: Which people?

Stacy: My children, parents, siblings, in-laws, friends, church members, etc.

DBM: I usually do not care so much about what others think of me. Fortunately or unfortunately, love and peace of mind are two of the most important things in my life. If I were in your shoes, I would follow my heart and not the opinions of others. Refuse to live up to the expectations of others. After all, not everyone will agree with your convictions

Stacy: When do you think I will find it in my heart to forgive him, even if we go our separate ways?

DBM: You would have to move to forgiveness in your own time. I don’t rush myself into forgiving people. I can’t force you to forgive me either, should I wrong you. You get me?

Stacy: You’ve been very helpful.

DBM: I’m glad to know.

Image Credits: Tobit Nazar Nieto Hernandez

Let’s Talk To Phyllis

Written by David B on . Posted in Blog. 3 Comments

David Bondze-Mbir (DBM): Thank you for participating. What name would you want to go by? (It can be your real first name or any other name of your choosing)

Participant 57: I am Phyllis

DBM: Hello Phyllis. How would you describe yourself?

Phyllis: I am real, I am not fake; I am strong in my faith and firm in my beliefs.

DBM: What do you want to talk about?

Phyllis: I’ve dated my fiancé for five years and we were already talking marriage this year. I would admittedly have been the luckiest lady to have him as my man three weeks ago, if I hadn’t found out about what he had been up to.

DBM: What has he been up to?

Phyllis: Let me start from the beginning. When we met, he was struggling to find his feet. I had no problem with that because he is smart and a goal chaser. He’s the guy who would work hard when the crunch is on, and still get the result. He’s not been the type that needs someone to motivate him; he’s always encouraging himself. He is strong and resilient, except when he’s being a softie. We’re both trained in the same field and in many ways, I could see the buoyancy that allows me to rise above problems and adversity in him. That was the first connection I felt between us when he approached me at the filling station with his résumé.

DBM: How old is he?

Phyllis: 39

DBM: How old are you?

Phyllis: 36

DBM: Okay

Phyllis: I helped him to find his current job and he’s been doing exceptionally well. He is respected by his peers. He fell sick two years ago and had to undergo three different surgeries. I used part of my savings to help clear his bills. There was this big contract his firm needed to secure, and him being the team lead for that particular assignment didn’t know how to put a convincing presentation together. He knew this was my field, and so he asked for my help. It took me two weeks to put everything in the bid together. I coached him and his team during weekends at home to get them to familiarize themselves with my work. They won the contract for their firm and he got a deserving commission. I was expecting to get my cut from his over 32,000 United States Dollar commission but he did not bring me in on it. His four other teammates made 15,000 USD each, and they all gave me 5000 USD off their cut.

DBM: What was the agreement between you two?

Phyllis: There was no agreement or payment terms discussed. I was just helping a boyfriend to secure a job contract, which eventually, got him a promotion.

DBM: Okay! But has he paid the money you used in clearing his hospital bills?

Phyllis: No!

DBM: Is he expected to pay back?

Phyllis: As a rational human being, I would have made attempts to pay back if I were him. I think because I haven’t specifically asked for the money, he is thinking it’s a gift.

DBM: Is it a gift?

Phyllis: No!

DBM: I see

Phyllis: I needed to use his phone to make a quick phone call because mine was on low battery. He was asleep when I picked the phone. An unread message was on the screen, and it was coming from another woman, telling him she loves him too.

DBM: Meaning, he told her he loves her?

Phyllis: He did! A lot of their chats had been deleted, and so there was nothing to see. I saved her number on my phone and tried to send her MoMo to see the name registered to it. I knew her; my company had worked for her father’s company before. It was their company that awarded my boyfriend’s firm the huge contract.

DBM: The proposal you worked on?

Phyllis: Same one.

DBM: Are you friends with this other lady?

Phyllis: I am not, but I know her

DBM: Why do you think he is dating her?

Phyllis: I confronted him and he told me he is in love with the both of us, and that, I shouldn’t force him to choose.

DBM: What does he mean by ‘don’t force him to choose’?

Phyllis: Dave, I am trying not to involve too many emotions into evaluating his actions, but I realized somewhere along the line, after winning that contract, that he wasn’t putting enough effort to be there for me when I needed him. I was basically the only one going out of my way to make things work in the relationship.

DBM: Was he present to you?

Phyllis: I wouldn’t know, because it seemed like all the little and big things I was doing for him often went unseen and I felt like my presence was actually in the shadow of his selfishness.

DBM: When did he propose marriage to you?

Phyllis: After he recovered from his third surgery.

DBM: Are you satisfied with the type of man he is?

Phyllis: He is a good guy

DBM: Is this ‘good guy’ the right man for you to marry?

Phyllis: Dave, being single can be unbearable, and I don’t know if I am in the right frame of mind right now, but he feels wrong to marry though he is the right man for me.

DBM: Why does he ‘feel wrong’?

Phyllis: I thought we had a strong partnership built on trust. With the introduction of this other woman in his life, I feel like there is this crack in the foundation of what we share.

DBM: Getting married to an unfaithful man has no power to keep the relationship, or even you from experiencing feelings you’d likely rather not have to go through.

Phyllis: What do I do now?

DBM: If I were in your shoes, I would make time for me, so I could find ways to regain my sense of self.

Phyllis: What do I do with him at the meantime?

DBM: Avoid him as much as physically and electronically

Phyllis: But we live together

DBM: Whose house, is it?

Phyllis: Mine

DBM: You have your answer.

Phyllis: He’s the only man I’ve really loved

DBM: I can imagine but being in love is not enough to make a relationship a healthy one. Is what he is doing to you going to make you happy down the line – if he’s unable to stick to only you? You need time to process everything that has happened if you’re uncertain of being able to compromise rather too much.

Image Credit: Muhammadtaha Ibrahim

POPULAR

Contact Us

  • maildmbir@gmail.com

Copyright 2022 David B - All Rights Reserved | Design: Javanet Systems